Learning to say no is a must have skill for everyone. Saying no early on can save you time, help you gain respect and avoid bitterness later on. The longer you let anyone present their petition the more apt you are to lose your strength to say no. Once I had a merciless salesman that wouldn’t even let me break in. being firmPoliteness simply provided him with more openings.

I literally raised my hand and put it directly in front of his mouth, with my open palm towards him. When my hand had his quiet attention I said: “NO.” Then I “gently” closed the door on any further discussion in a manner that was unmistakable.
Learning how to say NO can free up an enormous amount of time for successother things in your life that are important to you. Generally speaking, people that can’t say no are worried about upsetting the other person. They often find it unpleasant to disagree with others, or they believe that in the long run, just saying yes is easier than saying no. Others can simply not say no at all. Inevitably, everyone that knows them will be taking advantage of them, even little Cub Scouts.
There are instances where saying no to a request will be a matter of survival and the sooner you learn how how to utter that tiny little word, “no” the happier you will be.

You don’t have to bristle up to say no. When you say it sweet and firm the other party will hit a brick wall. Probably they’ve never faced sweet denial before. You don’t want to look smug of your firmness, or proud of denying the other party access to their desires that they hoped to obtain through you; They know they can deal with that type of attitude. But, if you say no, sweet, and firm then they really have hit an unfamiliar brick wall.
You don’t need to cook stories up in order to sweeten your refusal. You don’t need to offer lame excuses of any kind. You have a God-given right to say no. You can say no without being dishonest. You can even say no when they demand an explanation. This is your life and saying no early on will save you a good deal of time, and even earn you an admirer.

I remember one top executive that had her full staff terrified of her. I couldn’t understand their fear, going in to our first interview. She looked just like a sweet little old lady when I went in and she listened carefully for a few minutes, then said no. Nothing else. The first time she told me NO it was done so sweetly that I didn’t believe I’d heard it right. She must have been answering a different question. Therefore I presented my petition in different words. The NO that time was just a little bit firmer but just as sweet as ever.

My offer was so great and gave them such wonderful advantages that I realized that she must have not understood what I was saying. Therefore I leaned forward with an opening up motion of my hands and a big smile on my face and began to explain it in more detail.

“Mr. X,” she broke in sweetly. “I understood you the first time. The answer is NO.” But I must have made some points with her because she subsequently added, sweetly of course.. “Now, IF you can make us the same offer from .. then this bank will be very much interested.” I could (finally) understand her reasoning, and I made some stretches to comply with her paradigm, from which both of us benefited greatly. For several years after that we remained on friendly terms any time our circles touched.

I have been a salesman for many years. A thousand people each day tell me no. Here are some sweet ways no can be said without breaking the hearts of us poor salesmen:
No

I can’t accept this, with my present commitments.
I’m sorry. No.
No. I don’t have any spare time right now and won’t have any in the future.
No, this is not a project I will want to be involved in.

I can’t. I won’t.
“After looking at my calendar, I see that I already have prior commitments.” This is a weasel that may backfire on you.

“I must decline, but thank you.” After I say this I give the other party one firm glance of denial, and begin closing the door on the situation.
No thanks. (This one has the power to stun the other party when used with a faint smile as if saying hades will freeze over before you give in to THAT suggestion.)

If a request catches you off guard and you aren’t sure how to say no, you can always take more time at home to make your decision without feeling guilty. In fact, if someone is insisting you must make a decision NOW, the safest thing to say is usually “No.” When you mean no the best answer is always “NO,” spoken firmly, and politely — but immovable.

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